What do you think of when you think of summertime? Do you think of barbecues, pool time, beach vacations, cold watermelon and even colder lemonade?

Those are the things I dream of as the days get longer and the temps get warmer, but honestly I kind of dread this time of year. First, I so don’t love a hundred degree temps and second I live in fear of the first news story which always has a title along the lines of  “Child Dies After Being Left in Hot Car.”

Those news stories get me every time and on hundred degree days like today, I always say a quick prayer that it won’t happen today. That tonight when I log onto facebook THAT story won’t be making the rounds. That when I log onto CNN or WFFA, I won’t see that it’s happened again.

If you ever read the comments on these stories they are full of finger-pointing and condemnation.

“What neglectful parents!”

“This is why some people shouldn’t be allowed to have kids!”

“How does that even happen?”

And can you blame them really?  It’s a horrific and tragic event. Believing that it could happen to anyone, regardless of how much they love and care for their kids, is downright terrifying. So people have to believe it was a case of neglect, a fault in the parents, and most of all they have to believe it could NEVER happen to them.

Honestly that is why this terrifies me EVERY summer. I don’t believe the vast majority of families this happens to are otherwise neglectful. I believe they are probably a lot like me, uncomfortably so. They are probably tired and trying to juggle so many things and fluctuating schedules that their brains just cannot physically keep up.

Their brains try to establish routines, to streamline their thoughts. They are so tired that they often run on auto pilot. They fall into a pattern, “wake up, shower, get dressed, eat, leave house, go to work.” How many times have you driven to someplace you’ve been a million times before and not really remembered how you got there? Obviously once you got in the car you began to drive, but the individual turns and paths you navigated are so ingrained in your mind that they are practically muscle memory.

So many hot car deaths are a result of this mental streamlining. Something changed, dad took the child because mom was running late, a parent was off for vacation and was preoccupied with what all they had to do when they got back into the office that  they were overwhelmed and focused on getting there. As a parent he results of these normal mental lapses can be devastatingly tragic.

The truth is that none of us want to admit is that this CAN happen to parents like us. Parents who love their kids to the moon and back. Parents who read bedtime stories every night. Parents who have their children’s photos hung up all over the house. Parents like me and parents like you.

But just because most of these tragic deaths are accidental, does not mean they are not preventable. Just like we as parents take precautions against kids crossing the street on their own and are on guard when pools or unfamiliar dogs are around there ARE things we can (and should) do so this doesn’t happen to us and our little loves.

Leave Something in the Backseat

Every time I put my baby boy in the car I always try to leave my purse on the floorboard in front of his carseat. I can’t go anywhere without my purse, it has the remote key fab in it to lock my car, my wallet, the keys to my house, and every other thing I need to accomplish anything. By leaving it back there I am making a conscious effort to guarantee, no matter what else is on my mind, that I will have to go to the backseat.

For you, your husband, and your child’s caretaker maybe a purse isn’t the right fit. So leave that cardigan you use to ward off the office chill, your wallet, your work ID badge, house key, or even your phone (because really we shouldn’t be on them when driving anyway). Find something you can’t live without and leave it in the backseat. Even better, get into the habit of leaving it back there even when you don’t have your child with you so opening that back door is second nature no matter where you go.

Try to Stick to a Routine

I know in today’s world of variable work hours this one is hard, but ideally it would be best to establish and stick to a routine. What do I mean by routine?  If possible, have one parent always drop your little one(s) off at daycare and one parent always pick them up. By creating a pattern you allow your mind to include dropping your child off/ picking them automatically even when operating in autopilot mode.

Keep in Touch With Your Spouse

If you have read my Love is a Lifestyle post, you may recall that my husband and I always begin our day with texts and calls to touch base with one another. In the beginning of our relationship, this was solely out of wanting to talk to each other but while we were both working it served an additional purpose: to make sure the kids were dropped off safe and sound.

Of course I don’t think my husband would ever forget our sons (and I’m pretty sure he is confidant I wouldn’t either). Yet after our oldest began going to daycare, the morning phone calls both ways always started with some variation of “How was little one when you dropped him off at school?”

We never had any crazy “I forgot I had him moments,”  but honestly with our crazy schedules and sleep deprived states I have to admit it that it terrifyingly could have happened. You see, try as we might, we couldn’t establish a schedule in those early dual income household days. I was working as a hair stylist a few cities over and occasionally didn’t get home until late and his schedule alternated, allowing him to drop our son off only 1-2 days of the three my son went to daycare.

By texting or calling to check in as soon as one of us was at work or post daycare drop off, we helped safeguard ourselves from tragedy. Old habits die hard and, even now that I work at home and have to drag my five year old out of bed for school, I still call my husband as soon as I pass the end of school zone sign. As a bonus I can honestly say that those chats are one of my favorite parts of the day.

Put a Mental Trigger in the Front Seat

While I leave my purse in the back, when I have my infant son, I put the diaper bag on the front seat. I have read of others leaving everything from a picture on the dashboard to a teddy bear on the cup holder. The idea is to put something in your line of sight to remind you that you have a baby on board. This is really such a simple way to protect your children and is perhaps the easiest of them all. After all, when I have the baby I have to lug my big blue diaper bag anyways, it takes no extra effort to put it in the front seat where I can see it.

I know that none of us want to believe that this could happen to us. We love our children so much we would die for them, so we could never forget them, right? But we are human, our minds are fallible, we are imperfectly made, we forget things, and we make mistakes. Babies love to fall asleep in cars, a blessing in most cases but not when it comes to rushing to work on a warm summer day. So be kind to yourself, prepare for the day where you are stressed and tired, for the day when the unthinkable may happen, and protect your children the best way you can by taking simple steps to keep them safe.