This is potentially one of those do as I say and not as I do situations. You see my venue wasn’t even fully constructed when I booked my wedding. There was a concrete slab, a basic structure without windows, a big pile of wood, an even bigger pile of rocks, so pretty much what everyone dreams about right? Oh you expect AC and a parking lot when you attend a wedding?! How very elitist of you (just kidding).
In reality a lot more research, forethought, and a bit of crossing my fingers went into my decision before money traded hands. Here are some of my guidelines before saying “I do” to your venue.
Get Off Your Computer and Visit
Know Your Budget
I’ll be honest I didn’t get married at my “dream venue.” You see as a teen I used to drive out to White Rock Lake in Dallas a few times a week. I loved everything about it from the children happily playing on the playgrounds to the sailboats gliding across the water. It was one place I could always go to escape whatever troubles were plaguing me and just breathe.
As locals probably already know White Rock is also home to the Dallas Arboretum. My husband is kind of a nerd when it comes to plants and, without knowing my love for White Rock, took me to the Arboretum as a surprise on our first date ( can you say soulmates?) I had dreamed of getting married there since I was a teen and now I had my heart set on it more than ever.
I had been engaged all of a week when I sent in a wedding information request. I received the reply and then suffered a mild case of sticker shock. The venue rental itself was potentially doable but at that time they had catering restrictions which after a few calculations would eat away at the majority of my budget. In the end, after weighing the pros and cons, I chose to check with other venues and luckily fell in love with one more firmly in my budget.
So save yourself potential heartbreak. Much like trying on a Christian Dior Dress when your budget doesn’t allow for that level of extravagance, visiting a venue outside your price range is asking for trouble. So write down what you can and what you are willing to spend, hold yourself to it, and start e-mailing! From there narrow down which venues fall into your price range and then consider visiting.
Location is Key
Perhaps you are dreaming of a wedding on a beach, waves crashing on a not too distant shore. While many brides share this dream only a fraction actually follow through with it. Unless you happen to live in Oceanside, CA or Maui (you lucky dogs), having a destination wedding can up guest costs to the point where your guest list may be much smaller than originally anticipated. If you are going for an intimate affair or if the majority of your guests are from out of town this may work to your benefit but otherwise perhaps selecting some place a little closer to home would be wise.
When selecting a “hometown” venue you may want to look at how far the majority of your guests will have to drive especially if it is an evening wedding. Set a radius of how far out you want in-town guests to have to travel when searching for venues to narrow down your search parameters. Look into what accommodations are nearby for guests that may not want to drive home, check into whether they offer shuttles and group discounts. Take into account that many wedding vendors charge for milage if your event is outside their typical service area, upping your overall cost.
Approximate Your Guest Count
Every venue has a limit as to how many guests can comfortably fit and many charge different prices for different guest count brackets. While you may not know exactly how many people will come to your wedding having a good guesstimate will go a long way. So pull up that excel spreadsheet or jot down a quick list in your notebook, add em up, and you have a decent starting point.
Keep in mind how a space will look when set up for your guests. A space meant for 400 will probably look pretty bare if set up for a wedding of 50. Conversely a space meant for 100 will be pretty jam packed with 125 or more (so cross your favorite diner off your list).
Read the Reviews
Take a break from combing every wedding board you can find on Pinterest and type in your list of potential venues into your search bar. Don’t just rely on the star rating, actually read the reviews. The ability to see what former customers have to say is an invaluable tool because at some point they were sitting exactly where you are and there’s a good chance whatever experience they had will be similar to yours.
Check for repetitive issues mentioned and decide how big a deal they will be to you personally. If Janie B. Bobb and three other brides mentioned swarms of bugs and you have entomophobia there is good chance that venue isn’t for you. If patterns of poor customer service emerge save yourself that headache and explore other options.
A reputable venue will respond to each and every review, good or bad, and will do so with understanding. They will respond not only with that they are looking into serious issues but will also detail the actual steps that are being taken to address these concerns for future brides. How responsive they are to others shows how responsive they will be to you and how seriously they will take your concerns as well.
There will always be a few bridezillas on every page so if you come across one or two out there posts along the lines of “they told me they had aqua tablecloths but it was actually a light shade of teal and I never bothered to see them before my wedding day” or “they cut off my groom after he only had 3 bottles of champagne and he can drink that much in his sleep” have a good laugh then run and show your fiancé to remind him how lucky he is to have found the awesomeness that is you.
What Does it Include?
Obviously when picking a venue the actual place is at the forefront of your mind, but there is a large range of what venues offer and what is included in the set rental fee. When we visited venues we found everything from full service venues, which included the food, cake, decor, venue rental, a wedding coordinator, and so much more all in their set price, to ones where they literally provided only the venue and everything from tables to lighting would have to be brought in by vendors.
This plays into thinking about your budget as well. If a venue charges a hundred dollars more but they have in house linens, tables, and chairs you may be better off going with them by the time you pay for rental and delivery fees. Or if a venue charges an equipment usage fee it still may be a better deal than using a third party.
Much like when you buy your first home or rent your first apartment, sit down and make a list of your non-negotiables and wants. Instead of an attached garage or central heat, think through amenities like a bridal suite to get ready in or adequate toilets (some outdoor venues utilize the ever attractive blue port-a-potties). Do you want your ceremony and reception held at the same place? If so add a ceremony site to the must-have list and if it’s an outdoor site check for rain contingency plans. As you visit the venues mark off what amenities they offer from your list and make note of extra perks you love to help narrow down your options later!
Get Off Your Computer and Visit
Yes this one requires leaving your house and putting on actual clothes (sorry about that). Pictures often don’t accurately portray what the venue will look like in person. Believe me these venues know their flaws and hire professional photographers to make an otherwise tiny closet look like a sprawling ballroom. The only way to know for sure what a venue is like is to go visit it.
I know what you are thinking… But your venue wasn’t even built when you booked, hypocrite! The venue I chose is owned by a company that has several venues throughout my area and even more in my state. I was able to view another venue in the area which although a different style showed me the quality I could expect. I also did make the drive (more than once) to view my venue and get good feel for what it would be like.
Check with your potential venues about open house events. They typically go all out for these events and you may be able to see what the venue looks like when spruced up for an event as well as how it actually looks with a decent number of people in it. Often these events include vendors so you can get some cards while checking things out (and often free food)!
Read That Contract!
I know I’m asking a lot here but it IS kind of important to read a legally binding document before signing your John Hancock. In this age of one-click acceptance of terms and agreements we sometimes have a tendency to forget the importance of reading the fine print. Think of the contract instead of a big list of what not to-dos because in addition to detailing critical payment information they detail their rules for your event.
My contract included everything from specifically what type of exit accoutrements I could use ( yeah those ever popular sparkler exits are a fire hazard apparently, party poopers), to how tall each candle holder needed to be past the wick (venues apparently have a vendetta against fire). Your contract will state what time you need to vacate and what time you can arrive, how they expect the venue to be left, and whether there is a clean up fee. It also includes kind of imperative information like if you are required to hire security and if you are limited to in-house vendors. So just read it, understand it, and be willing to comply with every written word.
Ask Questions
If you are unclear about any of the terms in the contract or have any questions in general be sure to ask the venue representative! This is literally their job and they field all sorts of questions from their brides all day every day. The terms that are set in the contract are to protect their property so they want them followed to avoid headaches for themselves, their other events, and you! The wedding business is very much based on word of mouth and glowing reviews so they want you to be happy and should want to help clarify anything you are confused about before it becomes a larger issue.
In this wedding planning game it’s very much to your advantage to ask permission than to go with “I’m sure it will be fine” because there is a very real chance the venue personnel will notice you trying to smuggle in your sparklers or attempting to staple gun things to the wall and put a ix nay to what ever illicit contraband or activity you are trying to sneak in, not to mention the extra fees you may be faced with even if you get away with it in the short term.
So happy venue hunting my brides to be! I hope I’ve given you a few extra things to think about (as if you didn’t already have enough) and that every one of you finds the venue of your dreams!
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